{"id":8819,"date":"2019-12-17T19:30:08","date_gmt":"2019-12-17T16:30:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/?p=8819"},"modified":"2020-06-09T01:41:21","modified_gmt":"2020-06-08T22:41:21","slug":"siddete-asigim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/siddete-asigim\/","title":{"rendered":"\u015eiddete \u00e2\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131m!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/strong>\u0130nsan \u015fiddete \u00e2\u015f\u0131k olur mu? Evet olur!.. Bu \u015fiddet a\u015fk\u0131 i\u00e7erisinde, meftunu(!) oldu\u011fumuz alt\u0131 harften olu\u015fan \u015feddeli \u015fiddet s\u00f6zc\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc, hem bir anne olarak toplum i\u00e7erisinde var olan, hem de var olma m\u00fcc\u00e2delesi veren bir kad\u0131n olarak yazmaya karar verdim.<\/p>\n

S\u00f6zl\u00fc\u011fe g\u00f6re mazo\u015fist: a\u015fa\u011f\u0131lanmaktan kendisine eziyet edilmesinden ruhi ya da fizik\u00ee ac\u0131 verilmesinden ho\u015flanan (kimse). Cins\u00ee zevk almas\u0131, doyuma ula\u015fmas\u0131 i\u00e7in kendisine fizik\u00ee ac\u0131 verilmesi gereken, fizik\u00ee ac\u0131dan cins\u00ee zevk alan sapk\u0131n (kimse) <\/em>olarak tan\u0131mlanmaktad\u0131r. <\/em>B\u00fcy\u00fck bir \u00e7o\u011funlu\u011fumuz mazo\u015fistin tan\u0131m\u0131n\u0131 okuyunca kendimize eziyet edilmesinden ho\u015flanan biri olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131za karar verdik. Peki, ayn\u0131 \u015feyi \u015fiddet s\u00f6zc\u00fc\u011f\u00fc i\u00e7in diyebiliyor muyuz? \u015eiddeti sevmedi\u011fimizi s\u00f6yl\u00fcyoruz ya, ger\u00e7ekten \u00f6yle mi? Sahiden de \u015fiddet g\u00f6stermeyi ve \u015fiddete maruz kalmay\u0131 sevmiyor muyuz? Sokakta, okulda, i\u015fte, evde \u015fiddetin her t\u00fcr\u00fcne maruz kal\u0131p, kendimizi ve etraf\u0131m\u0131zdakileri de benzer h\u00e2le maruz b\u0131rakm\u0131yor muyuz?<\/p>\n

\u015eiddet deyince ne anl\u0131yoruz peki? Sadece dayak yemek mi, \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclmek mi, yaralanmak m\u0131? Ya duygu olarak, psikolojik olarak, ekonomik ve sosyal olarak ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z \u015fiddet? K\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zdan k\u0131yafetimize, kiminle evlenece\u011fimizden, oturup kalk\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u0131za, makyaj\u0131m\u0131zdan kahkaham\u0131za kadar maruz kald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z \u015feyler ne? Ben, sen, o; biz, siz, onlar herkes \u015fiddete kar\u015f\u0131 da peki kim \u00fcretiyor bu kadar \u015fiddeti?<\/p>\n

Trafikte can\u0131m\u0131z m\u0131 s\u0131k\u0131ld\u0131, sinirlerimiz mi bozuldu, bir ma\u00e7ta yeniliyor muyuz, bizden g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fc birinden h\u0131rs\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kartmam\u0131z m\u0131 gerek, yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ilk \u015fey k\u00fcfretmek oluyor. \u00d6fkemizin esiri oldu\u011fumuzda akl\u0131m\u0131za ilk gelen k\u00fcf\u00fcr\u00fc hat\u0131rlayal\u0131m desem, y\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcz k\u0131zar\u0131r m\u0131?<\/p>\n

Kad\u0131n ya da erkek olmam\u0131zdan ba\u011f\u0131ms\u0131z, \u00f6znesinde ya anne ya da kad\u0131n bedeni var de\u011fil mi? Nedense erke\u011fe, erkek kimli\u011fi \u00fczerinden ancak hakaret edebiliyoruz, erke\u011fe k\u00fcf\u00fcr etmek istiyorsak ill\u00e2ki kad\u0131n kimli\u011fini kullanaca\u011f\u0131z. Sonra da kad\u0131n cinayetleri ve kad\u0131nlara kar\u015f\u0131 \u015fiddetten muzdaribiz diyece\u011fiz de\u011fil mi?<\/p>\n

D\u00fcnyaya gelen her kad\u0131n \u015fiddete u\u011frayacak demek de\u011fil. Bence g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde \u015fiddetin ma\u011fduru mu, ma\u011fruru mu olaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 \u00e7izgisinden \u00e7\u0131kan toplumun bozulmu\u015f de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131 belirliyor.<\/p>\n

Birden fazla \u00e7ocu\u011fun oldu\u011fu evde, hele de k\u0131z ve erkek karde\u015f var ise ayr\u0131mc\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fiddetle soslanan h\u00e2lini tad\u0131yoruz, akl\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ilk kesmeye ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131 andan itibaren. Sokakta oynad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z oyundan, arkada\u015f\u0131m\u0131za, eve geli\u015f saatimizden, evdeki i\u015f b\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcne ve sevdam\u0131za kadar. G\u00f6zlerinizi kapat\u0131p \u00e7ocuklu\u011funuzu an\u0131msad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda; \u2018k\u0131z\u0131m sen d\u0131\u015far\u0131 \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p arkada\u015flar\u0131nla oyna, gez ama o\u011flum ablan ya da k\u0131z karde\u015fin d\u0131\u015far\u0131dayken sen evde kal\u0131p temizlik yapacaks\u0131n, bula\u015f\u0131k y\u0131kayacaks\u0131n, bana ev i\u015finde yard\u0131m edeceksin\u2019 diyen anne fig\u00fcr\u00fc canland\u0131 ise an\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131zda, siz \u00e7ok \u015fansl\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z. Tam tersi mi canland\u0131 haf\u0131zan\u0131zda, \u00fcz\u00fclmeyin! Yaln\u0131z de\u011filsiniz, milyonlarca kad\u0131n var sizinle ayn\u0131 kaderi payla\u015fan.<\/p>\n

Sad\u0131ka \u00f6\u011fretmenler iyi atlara binip gittiler\u2026<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Karadeniz\u2019in k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck ili Sinop\u2019un sakin bir k\u00f6y\u00fcnde okudum ortaokulu. Okulun toplam mevcudu 40 ki\u015fiyi bulmuyordu. 12 ki\u015filik s\u0131n\u0131fta o zaman\u0131n (1992-95) m\u00fcfredat\u0131na g\u00f6re d\u00f6nem boyunca, haftada bir g\u00fcn, tam g\u00fcn olacak \u015fekilde ev ekonomisi ve y\u00f6netimi ile i\u015f teknik ve e\u011fitimi dersi vard\u0131. Ek olarak da sa\u011fl\u0131k bilgisi ve ilk yard\u0131m uygulamalar\u0131. Ev ekonomisi dersimize Sad\u0131ka ad\u0131nda, Ankaral\u0131, esmer g\u00fczeli bir \u00f6\u011fretmenimiz gelirdi. Niye ise haf\u0131zam onu bu s\u0131fatlarla an\u0131ms\u0131yor her seferinde. Bug\u00fcn edindi\u011fim ne kadar hobim varsa hepsini ondan \u00f6\u011frendim. Diki\u015f dikmek, makrome yapmak, \u00f6rg\u00fc \u00f6rmek, nak\u0131\u015f i\u015flemek, kuma\u015f boyamak, tak\u0131 tasarlamak, minyat\u00fcr hal\u0131 ve kilim dokumak. \u00d6yle ba\u015ftan savma de\u011fil, kallavi \u015fekilde zanaatk\u00e2r olacakm\u0131\u015f\u0131z gibi titizlikle \u00f6\u011frenmeye zorlard\u0131 bizi. Hatta bir keresinde i\u015f teknik ve e\u011fitimi s\u0131n\u0131f\u0131ndan alet \u00e7antas\u0131n\u0131 getirtip tek tek tan\u0131tm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 aletleri. Bir \u015feyi tamir etti\u011fime denk gelenlerin gereksiz \u00f6vg\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fcn tek sebebi, Sad\u0131ka \u00f6\u011fretmenimin tamir \u00e7antas\u0131ndaki aletleri tek tek anlatt\u0131\u011f\u0131 dersleridir.<\/p>\n

Sad\u0131ka \u00f6\u011fretmenimden uzun uzun bahsetmemin tabii ki bir sebebi var. Elinden her i\u015f gelen bu kad\u0131n\u0131n bir \u00f6zelli\u011fi vard\u0131. Evde ailemizin bize bi\u00e7ti\u011fi rollerin d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda \u015feylerle bizi g\u00f6revlendiriyordu. \u00d6rg\u00fc m\u00fc \u00f6r\u00fclecek, hal\u0131 m\u0131 dokunacak, nak\u0131\u015f m\u0131 i\u015flenecek \u00f6nce erkeklere;\u00a0 kontrplak m\u0131 kesilecek, bir \u015fey mi \u00e7ivilenecek, hal\u0131 dokumak i\u00e7in tezg\u00e2h m\u0131 yap\u0131lacak \u00f6nce k\u0131zlara \u00f6\u011fretip yapt\u0131r\u0131yordu. Hele masa d\u00fczeni ve yemek yapmay\u0131 \u00f6\u011frettikten sonra bula\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 erkeklere y\u0131katmas\u0131 yok mu, \u00e2deta mest oluyorduk. \u0130\u00e7inde yeti\u015fti\u011fimiz sosyal ortama g\u00f6re bunlar bizi \u00e7ok mutlu etse de erkekler ve tabii ki aileler i\u00e7in bunlar pek ho\u015f gelmiyordu. \u00dczerinden y\u0131llar ge\u00e7ti, kad\u0131n erkek e\u015fitli\u011fine s\u00f6ylemde de\u011fil \u00f6z\u00fcnde inanan Sad\u0131ka \u00f6\u011fretmenler gitti. Daha d\u00f6rt-be\u015f ya\u015flar\u0131nda s\u0131byan mektebi denilen kurumlarda haremlik selaml\u0131k yeti\u015ftirilen \u00e7ocuklar gelmeye ba\u015flad\u0131.<\/p>\n

Kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131ks\u0131z(!) a\u015fk,<\/span> tec\u00e2v\u00fcz, kan, cinayet\u2026 32 k\u0131s\u0131m tekmili birden<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Sad\u0131ka \u00f6\u011fretmenden sonra toplumun dayatt\u0131\u011f\u0131 cinsiyet rollerine bak\u0131\u015f\u0131m bir daha eskisi gibi olmad\u0131. Kad\u0131n erkek ili\u015fkilerini hep sorgulad\u0131m durdum. Daha ana kuca\u011f\u0131ndan biz kad\u0131nlar\u0131n, kad\u0131nlara yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00f6tekile\u015ftirme ile ba\u015fl\u0131yor hem erkeklerle hem de kad\u0131n olarak kad\u0131nlarla m\u00fcc\u00e2delemiz… \u00d6yle ya; (Karn\u0131ndan s\u0131pay\u0131, s\u0131rt\u0131ndan sopay\u0131 eksik etme. Sa\u00e7\u0131 uzun akl\u0131 k\u0131sa. Kar\u0131 gibi dedikodu yapma. At ile avrat yi\u011fit baht\u0131na. Di\u015fi yalanmazsa erkek dolanmaz. Dul kad\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnden di\u015fi k\u00f6pek bile ge\u00e7er. Kad\u0131n\u0131n s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc k\u0131rk y\u0131lda bir, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc senede bir dinle vb.) \u015fiddete al\u0131\u015ft\u0131ran atas\u00f6zleri hangi toplumun eseri? \u015eiddetten ma\u011fduruz ama \u015fiddeti uygulad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 iddia etti\u011fimiz (ne yaz\u0131k ki \u00f6yle) erkek k\u00fclt\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fc yeti\u015ftiren annelerin de art\u0131k kendisini sorgulamas\u0131 gerekmiyor mu deniyor. Evet, kad\u0131nlar sorguluyor ve art\u0131k \u00e7ocuk yeti\u015ftirme y\u00f6ntemlerini sevindirici bir \u015fekilde de\u011fi\u015ftiriyorlar.<\/p>\n

TV\u2019lere ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 bir \u00fclkeyiz. En \u00e7ok izledi\u011fimiz dizilerin ortak \u00f6zelli\u011fi bol kanl\u0131, vurdulu k\u0131rd\u0131l\u0131 cinayetli, cinayetin hangi y\u00f6ntem ve tekniklerle nas\u0131l i\u015flenece\u011fini anlatan, su\u00e7u kan\u0131ksatan mafya dizileri. Kad\u0131na cinsel sald\u0131r\u0131 ile ba\u015flay\u0131p, \u015fiddeti \u00f6z\u00fcmsemi\u015f ama melek(!) gibi kalbe sahip \u00e2\u015f\u0131k a\u011fa dizileri. Hukuk devre d\u0131\u015f\u0131, paralel bir hukuk d\u00fczeni (ad\u0131na t\u00f6re deyip de t\u00f6remize hakaret ettikleri) var. \u00d6nce k\u00fclt\u00fcr kurallar\u0131, sonra hukuk, orada da hukukun cezaland\u0131rmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 (\u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc cezan\u0131n cayd\u0131r\u0131c\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 y\u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fcn olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n bilin\u00e7alt\u0131m\u0131za mesaj\u0131 verilerek \u015fiddet normalle\u015ftiriliyor) ama s\u00f6zde t\u00f6renin(!) h\u00fck\u00fcm verdi\u011fi feodal d\u00fczen. Daha birka\u00e7 g\u00fcn \u00f6nce bir n\u00e2z\u0131r\u0131m\u0131z, g\u00fcndelik hayat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n bu dizilerdeki \u015fiddetten fark\u0131 kalmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve dizilerdeki cinayetlerin g\u00fcnl\u00fck hayat\u0131m\u0131zda birebir i\u015flenmeye ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bey\u00e2n etti.<\/p>\n

\u015eiddetin me\u015frula\u015ft\u0131r\u0131lmas\u0131ndaki sihirli s\u00f6zc\u00fck \u201cnamus\u201d. \u0130\u015fin tuhaf\u0131 erkek i\u00e7in de, kad\u0131n i\u00e7in de namus kad\u0131n bedeni ile s\u0131n\u0131rl\u0131. De\u011fil mi, itiraz m\u0131 ediyorsunuz yoklay\u0131n haf\u0131zan\u0131z\u0131, erke\u011fin elimin kiri dedi\u011fi kad\u0131na, biz kad\u0131nlar ne diyoruz? Kendimize verdi\u011fimiz cevapla ge\u00e7ebildik mi d\u00fcr\u00fcstl\u00fck s\u0131nav\u0131n\u0131?\u00a0 25 Kas\u0131m\u2019da gazete man\u015fetlerini \u00e7arp\u0131c\u0131 bir haber s\u00fcsl\u00fcyordu \u201cAntalya\u2019da jigolo adaylar\u0131n\u0131 doland\u0131ran 9\u2019u kad\u0131n 19 ki\u015filik \u00e7ete tutukland\u0131.\u201d diye. G\u00f6zlerime inanamam\u0131\u015ft\u0131m jigolo adaylar\u0131 s\u00f6zc\u00fcklerini g\u00f6r\u00fcnce… Bir an tam tersini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcp man\u015feti tersinden \u015f\u00f6yle atal\u0131m \u201cFahi\u015fe adaylar\u0131n\u0131 doland\u0131ran …\u201d tepkiniz nas\u0131l olurdu? \u0130ki farkl\u0131 ama anlam\u0131 ayn\u0131 s\u00f6zc\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131zdaki yeri ayn\u0131 m\u0131? Nas\u0131l h\u00e2l\u00e2 verdi\u011finiz cevapla d\u00fcr\u00fcstl\u00fck s\u0131nav\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015far\u0131yla ge\u00e7tim diyor musunuz? Kad\u0131na ay\u0131p olan toplum normlar\u0131nda erkek i\u00e7in ayn\u0131 oranda ay\u0131p say\u0131l\u0131yor mu, ya da cemaat iktisat te\u015fekk\u00fcllerinin g\u00fcncelledi\u011fi(!) dinde kad\u0131na g\u00fcnah olan erke\u011fe g\u00fcnah say\u0131l\u0131yor mu? Gelelim en can al\u0131c\u0131 soruya, hukuk kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda kad\u0131n ve erkek e\u015fit mi? Yasalar kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda evet, ya pratikte ve uygulamada?<\/p>\n

K\u0131skan\u00e7l\u0131k, aldatma, aldatma \u015f\u00fcphesi, aldatma imas\u0131, bir erkekle konu\u015fmak yetiyor da art\u0131yor namussuz olman\u0131za. \u00c7o\u011funlukla da bu namussuzlu\u011fun(!) bedeli kad\u0131n i\u00e7in \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fclmek. Taray\u0131n ve kar\u015f\u0131la\u015ft\u0131r\u0131n namus cinayeti denilen \u015fiddetin haberlerini. K\u0131skan\u00e7l\u0131k ve aldatma iddias\u0131 ile ka\u00e7 kad\u0131n ka\u00e7 erke\u011fi \u00f6ld\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f, ka\u00e7 erkek ka\u00e7 kad\u0131n\u0131? Ka\u00e7 kad\u0131n namus(!) cinayetinden ceza indirimi alm\u0131\u015f, ka\u00e7 erkek namus (!) cinayeti ile \u00e2deta \u00f6d\u00fcllendirilmi\u015f? \u015eule \u00c7et, Ceren Damar \u015eenel, Ceren \u00d6zdemir ve daha niceleri, \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fckten sonra bile namussuzlukla, \u00fcstelik hukuk\u00e7u(!) kimli\u011fi ta\u015f\u0131yan erkekler taraf\u0131ndan itham edilmedi mi? Ne yaz\u0131k ki 13 Aral\u0131k g\u00fcn\u00fc; bir kad\u0131na, tec\u00e2v\u00fcz ma\u011fduru oldu\u011fu iddias\u0131yla hakk\u0131n\u0131 arad\u0131\u011f\u0131 adliyede bir kad\u0131n savc\u0131n\u0131n, \u201cBen de kad\u0131n\u0131m, ben niye tec\u00e2v\u00fcze u\u011fram\u0131yorum da sen u\u011fruyorsun?\u201d dedi\u011fi haberleri bas\u0131nda yer ald\u0131. \u00dclkemizin kurucusu Atat\u00fcrk\u2019\u00fcn, annesi Z\u00fcbeyde Han\u0131m\u2019a vesikal\u0131 iftiras\u0131 at\u0131lmad\u0131 m\u0131? Kad\u0131n siyaset\u00e7ilere \u201cKucakta oturtma, z\u0131platma\u201d gibi son derece a\u015fa\u011f\u0131l\u0131k bir \u015fekilde bel alt\u0131ndan vurulmad\u0131 m\u0131?\u00a0 Giydi\u011fimiz elbise i\u00e7in d\u00f6v\u00fclmedik mi, etek boyumuz mahkemede hukuk\u00e7u kimli\u011fimize ra\u011fmen, h\u00e2kim bey taraf\u0131ndan \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fclmedi mi?<\/p>\n

Bir de a\u015fk cinayetleri var! Kendisinden ayr\u0131lan, \u00fc\u00e7 \u00e7ocuk annesi sevgilisinin bo\u011faz\u0131n\u0131 keserek \u00f6ld\u00fcrd\u00fc. Platonik \u00e2\u015f\u0131k, gen\u00e7 kad\u0131n\u0131 canice katletti. Kendisine y\u00fcz vermeyen gen\u00e7 k\u0131z\u0131 kur\u015funlad\u0131.\u00a0 Ne kadar \u00e7ok haberi an\u0131msad\u0131n\u0131z an\u0131msamas\u0131na da, saplant\u0131l\u0131 \u00e2\u015f\u0131k kad\u0131nlar\u0131n, katletti\u011fi erkeklerin cinayet haberlerini an\u0131msamakta olduk\u00e7a zorland\u0131n\u0131z. Tabii akla ziyan h\u00e2llerimiz de yok de\u011fil. 7 Aral\u0131k g\u00fcn\u00fc Bursa\u2019da Sokak ortas\u0131nda yedi\u011fi meydan daya\u011f\u0131 kameralara yans\u0131m\u0131\u015ft\u0131 N.D.\u2019nin. Polis zanl\u0131y\u0131 yakalam\u0131\u015f, ma\u011fdur gen\u00e7 k\u0131z\u0131n da ifadesine ba\u015fvurmu\u015ftu. Gen\u00e7 k\u0131z ifadesinde; \u201cSevgilisi O.D ile yolda y\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fcklerini, y\u00fcr\u00fcrken kendisinin yoldan ge\u00e7en bir erke\u011fe bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, bunu g\u00f6ren sevgilisinin de kendisini k\u0131skan\u0131p d\u00f6vd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc ama erkek arkada\u015f\u0131ndan \u015fik\u00e2yet\u00e7i olmayaca\u011f\u0131n<\/em><\/span>\u0131 onu \u00e7ok sevdi\u011fini\u201d s\u00f6yledi\u011fi ifadesini bas\u0131nda okuyunca, deh\u015fete kap\u0131lmamak elde de\u011fil.<\/p>\n

Kocas\u0131ndan \u015fiddet g\u00f6ren kad\u0131n 6 kez \u015fik\u00e2yette bulundu ve buna ra\u011fmen kocas\u0131 taraf\u0131ndan canice katledildi. Kocas\u0131ndan dayak yedi\u011fi i\u00e7in 3 ay hastanede yatmak zorunda kalan kad\u0131n, kocas\u0131 taraf\u0131ndan katledildi. Eski kocas\u0131 hakk\u0131nda tam 23 kez savc\u0131l\u0131\u011fa \u015fik\u00e2yette bulunup, can g\u00fcvenli\u011fimi sa\u011flay\u0131n diyen Ay\u015fe Tu\u011fba Arslan, sokak ortas\u0131nda sat\u0131rla \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc. Yar\u0131m saat \u00f6nce polise ba\u015fvuran ve karakolda kalarak can g\u00fcvenli\u011fini sa\u011flamaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan Emine Bulut, karakoldan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131ktan sonra sokakta k\u0131z\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fc \u00f6n\u00fcnde, eski kocas\u0131 taraf\u0131ndan bo\u011faz\u0131 kesilerek \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcld\u00fc. K\u0131z\u0131n\u0131n \u201dAnne ne olur \u00f6lme!\u201d<\/em> diye att\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7\u0131\u011fl\u0131klar h\u00e2l\u00e2 T\u00fcrk Milletinin kulaklar\u0131nda. Daha vahimi \u00fclkenin ana muhalefet lideri canl\u0131 yay\u0131nda, naklen lin\u00e7 giri\u015fimine maruz kald\u0131 ve \u015fiddeti uygulayanlar adalet eli ile \u00f6d\u00fcllendirildi. \u015eiddet en \u00fcst perdeden hukuk eliyle normalle\u015ftirildi. Kad\u0131na, hayvana ve \u00e7ocu\u011fa kar\u015f\u0131 i\u015flenen su\u00e7larda adliyemiz ne yaz\u0131k ki ma\u011fduru cezaland\u0131rma, su\u00e7luyu \u00f6d\u00fcllendirme yoluna gidiyor. Bu da maalesef sosyolojik, k\u00fclt\u00fcrel ve din\u00ee temellere dayand\u0131r\u0131lan \u015fiddeti \u00e2deta kurumla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131yor.<\/p>\n

Tec\u00e2v\u00fcz ger\u00e7e\u011fimiz. Hep kad\u0131na, hayvana ve \u00e7ocu\u011fa tec\u00e2v\u00fcz\u00fc konu\u015fuyoruz. \u00c7ocuk tec\u00e2v\u00fczlerinin \u00f6nemli bir k\u0131sm\u0131 erkek \u00e7ocuklar\u0131na y\u00f6nelik oluyor. O kadar \u00e7ok \u00e7ocu\u011fa tec\u00e2v\u00fcz vakas\u0131 duyduk ki deh\u015fete kap\u0131lmamak m\u00fcmk\u00fcn de\u011fil. O tec\u00e2v\u00fczlerin sonras\u0131ndaki rehabilitasyon s\u00fcre\u00e7leri, bu \u015fiddetin topluma psikolojik, sosyolojik ve travmatik etkileri \u00fczerine ise hi\u00e7 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnme ihtiyac\u0131 hissetmedik. U\u011frad\u0131\u011f\u0131 tec\u00e2v\u00fczdeki ma\u011fduriyetini \u015fiddet ile de\u011fil, hukuk ile \u00e7\u00f6zmek isteyen Ahmet Emre Y\u0131ld\u0131r; b\u00fcy\u00fck bir cesaret \u00f6rne\u011fi g\u00f6stererek \u015fiddetin g\u00f6rmezden geldi\u011fimiz y\u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fc bir kez daha bize hat\u0131rlatt\u0131. \u015eiddete maruz kalman\u0131n kad\u0131n\u0131 erke\u011fi yok, hele de mevzubahis cinsel \u015fiddet ise. Ve yine adalet, siz \u00f6ld\u00fckten sonra tecelli et(tiril)meye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131l\u0131yor. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc Emre, adalete olan t\u00fcm inanc\u0131n\u0131 yitirdi\u011fi i\u00e7in ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 travman\u0131n etkisi ile intihar etmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n

E\u015fit i\u015fe e\u015fit \u00fccret!.. Bu sadece \u00fclkemize \u00f6zg\u00fc bir sorun de\u011fil \u00fcstelik. Hollywood\u2019da bile, kad\u0131n oyuncular erkek oyunculara g\u00f6re %56 oran\u0131nda daha az kazan\u0131yor. Devlet memurlar\u0131 hari\u00e7, e\u015fit i\u015fte kad\u0131n olarak erkeklerle e\u015fit \u00fccret alabiliyor muyuz? Anne oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in i\u015f hayat\u0131ndan kopmak zorunda kalan\/b\u0131rak\u0131lan binlerce kad\u0131n var, baba oldu\u011fu i\u00e7in i\u015f hayat\u0131ndan kopan ka\u00e7 baba var? Ya da siyasilerin s\u00f6yleminin politikaya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fmesi nedeniyle evde oturtulmay\u0131, g\u00fcncellenen din(!) ile sosyal hayattan kopar\u0131lmay\u0131, tek misyonu ve vizyonu ev, ev i\u00e7erisindeki i\u015f olan kad\u0131n fig\u00fcr\u00fc dayatmas\u0131n\u0131 hangi \u015fiddet t\u00fcr\u00fcne sokaca\u011f\u0131z?<\/p>\n

Evlenirken baz\u0131 erkekler kad\u0131n \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmas\u0131n, evde yemek, temizlik yaps\u0131n, \u00e7ocuk baks\u0131n istiyor. Sonra da o kad\u0131n bo\u015fanmak istedi\u011finde nafaka \u00f6dememek i\u00e7in kanunlar\u0131n t\u00fcm bo\u015fluklar\u0131n\u0131 kullan\u0131yor. Veya tam tersi varl\u0131kl\u0131, ekonomik durumu iyi olan erke\u011fin imk\u00e2nlar\u0131n\u0131 evlilik birli\u011fi ya da bo\u015fanma sonras\u0131nda sonuna kadar istismar etmiyor muyuz? Tamam, kad\u0131na \u015fiddet en \u00f6nemli sorunumuz ama birde baz\u0131 kad\u0131nlar\u0131n erke\u011fe uygulad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ekonomik \u015fiddet istismar\u0131 yok mu? Elimizi vicdan\u0131m\u0131za koyal\u0131m biz kad\u0131nlar da, f\u0131rsat\u0131n\u0131 bulunca g\u00fcc\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn yetti\u011fi t\u00fcrde \u015fiddeti uygulam\u0131yor muyuz kar\u015f\u0131m\u0131zdakine?<\/p>\n

S\u0131radanla\u015f(t\u0131r\u0131l)an \u015fiddet ger\u00e7e\u011fi\u2026<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Asl\u0131nda ne ger\u00e7ek din, ne de mill\u00ee kimli\u011fimizle uyu\u015fmayan, ekseninden sapm\u0131\u015f sosyolojik, din\u00ee, k\u00fclt\u00fcrel ve \u00f6rf\u00ee kurallarla al\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z bir \u015fiddet ger\u00e7e\u011fi var. \u015eiddeti uygulayan h\u00e2kim g\u00fc\u00e7 erkek, uygulanan ise kad\u0131n. \u0130statistik\u00ee veriler i\u00e7in bile \u00e7ok k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck say\u0131lacak derecede kad\u0131n\u0131n fizik\u00ee, cins\u00ee, din\u00ee ve k\u00fclt\u00fcrel \u015fiddeti (ekonomik \u015fiddet hari\u00e7, burada nispeten bir denge s\u00f6z konusu denebilir) neredeyse yok diyebiliriz. \u00dclke y\u00f6netiminde kad\u0131nlar\u0131n temsilci ve karar al\u0131c\u0131 olarak etkinli\u011fi ve say\u0131lar\u0131ndaki azl\u0131k ile \u015fiddet oran\u0131n\u0131n y\u00fcksekli\u011finin ba\u011flant\u0131l\u0131 oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnenlerdenim.<\/p>\n

Bizi \u015fiddet sarmal\u0131na hapseden, \u2018kad\u0131nlar sadece oy versin ama bizi se\u00e7sin, b\u00fcrokraside, devletin her kademesinde, i\u015f d\u00fcnyas\u0131nda erkekler olal\u0131m!\u2019 zihniyeti de\u011fil mi? Ba\u015fbakanl\u0131k koltu\u011funa ve \u0130\u00e7i\u015fleri Bakanl\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2019na bir kez kad\u0131n kimli\u011finin gelmi\u015f olmas\u0131 d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda, kad\u0131na zimmetlenen Aile ve Sosyal Politikalar Bakanl\u0131\u011f\u0131 hari\u00e7 hangi bakanl\u0131klar kad\u0131n siyaset\u00e7ilere emanet ediliyor? Arada birka\u00e7 istisna oldu onu da ifade etmezsem haks\u0131zl\u0131k olur!.. Siyasette kad\u0131n kollar\u0131 var da erkek kollar\u0131 neden yok? \u0130\u00e7i\u015fleri Bakanl\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2019n\u0131n T\u00fcrkiye tarihinde bir kez kad\u0131n kimli\u011fine emanet edilmi\u015f olmas\u0131n\u0131, yine bir kad\u0131n ba\u015fbakana bor\u00e7lu de\u011fil miyiz? 28 \u015eubat s\u00fcrecindeki cinsiyet odakl\u0131 hakaretamiz c\u00fcmleler, \u0130\u00e7i\u015fleri Bakanl\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2019n\u0131 sekiz ay kadar bir kad\u0131n\u0131n yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hat\u0131rlat\u0131yor hemen bize. Bu s\u00f6ylem olmasa onu da hat\u0131rlamayaca\u011f\u0131z neredeyse. Mill\u00ee Savunma, Adalet, Sa\u011fl\u0131k, Hazine ve Maliye, Ekonomi, Teknoloji, Tar\u0131m Bakanl\u0131klar\u0131, neden buralarda g\u00f6stermelik de\u011fil, ger\u00e7ekten kad\u0131n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131 ve h\u00e2kimiyetini g\u00f6rm\u00fcyoruz?<\/p>\n

T\u00fcrkiye\u2019de 81 il, 922 il\u00e7e var. En az 1003 M\u00fclk\u00ee \u0130dari Amirlik y\u00f6netimi i\u00e7inde, ka\u00e7 tane valimiz, kaymakam\u0131m\u0131z kad\u0131n, ka\u00e7 tane il emniyet m\u00fcd\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fcz kad\u0131n, ka\u00e7 rekt\u00f6r\u00fcm\u00fcz, ba\u015fhekimimiz, konsolosumuz kad\u0131n? En \u00f6nemlisi 600 vekilimizin neden yar\u0131s\u0131 kad\u0131n de\u011fil? Kilit noktalarda karar al\u0131c\u0131 ve icrac\u0131 b\u00fcrokratlar\u0131n \u201cbadem b\u0131y\u0131kl\u0131 emmiler\u201d olmas\u0131na ise hi\u00e7 girmiyorum.<\/p>\n

Kad\u0131n\u0131n i\u00e7inde olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131 fikir, hareket ya da siyas\u00ee yap\u0131 ayakta duramaz. T\u00fcrkiye\u2019de ba\u015far\u0131y\u0131 yakalayan\u00a0siyasi partilere bak\u0131n, merkeze kad\u0131n kimli\u011fini alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. Oy kullan\u0131rken kad\u0131n erkek e\u015fitiz, parti kurarken de cinsiyet ay\u0131rt etmeden kitleye hitap ediyoruz ama kad\u0131n kollar\u0131 kurarak erkek egemenli\u011fini il\u00e2n ediyoruz.<\/p>\n

\u015eiddet ve a\u015fk… \u015eiddet ve aile… \u0130\u00e7 i\u00e7e. Bir kad\u0131n olmakla ma\u011fduru ya da ma\u011fruru ama ka\u00e7\u0131n\u0131lmaz bir \u015fekilde \u015fiddetle her g\u00fcn kar\u015f\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131yay\u0131z. \u015eiddete \u00e2\u015f\u0131k m\u0131y\u0131z? Hepimiz i\u00e7in cevap, hay\u0131r! Art\u0131k ne kadar ger\u00e7ekse. \u015eiddeti bir b\u00fct\u00fcn olarak g\u00f6r\u00fcyorum. Evlad\u0131ma kad\u0131n ya da erkek olman\u0131n de\u011fil, insan olman\u0131n, d\u00fcr\u00fcst olman\u0131n, hak yememenin, hak araman\u0131n, hakk\u0131 teslim etmenin erdemini anlat\u0131yorum. Bu bilin\u00e7le evlat yeti\u015ftirmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc bizi ancak onlar, meftunu h\u00e2line geldi\u011fimiz bu \u015fiddet sarmal\u0131ndan \u00e7ekip \u00e7\u0131karacak ve biz ancak onlar\u0131n sayesinde insan olmay\u0131, insan kalmay\u0131 her \u015feyin \u00fcst\u00fcnde tutarak yar\u0131na g\u00fcvenle, huzurla ve mutlulukla y\u00fcr\u00fcmeyi ba\u015faraca\u011f\u0131z.<\/p>\n

Sahi siz alt\u0131 harfli, \u015feddeli \u015fiddete \u00e2\u015f\u0131k m\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

D\u00fcnyaya gelen her kad\u0131n \u015fiddete u\u011frayacak demek de\u011fil. Bence g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fczde \u015fiddetin ma\u011fduru mu, ma\u011fruru mu olaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 \u00e7izgisinden \u00e7\u0131kan toplumun bozulmu\u015f de\u011fer yarg\u0131lar\u0131 belirliyor.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":75,"featured_media":8830,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_ef_editorial_meta_date_first-draft-date":"","_ef_editorial_meta_paragraph_assignment":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[62,2],"tags":[494,1103,1367,1134,1368,1133,1108,1105,156,1369],"coauthors":[246],"class_list":["post-8819","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-egitim-kultur","category-genel","tag-kadin","tag-kadina-siddet","tag-kufur","tag-kultur","tag-namus","tag-siddet","tag-taciz","tag-tecavuz","tag-tore","tag-yasak-ask"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8819","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/75"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8819"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8819\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10513,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8819\/revisions\/10513"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8830"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8819"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8819"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8819"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/millidusunce.com\/misak\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/coauthors?post=8819"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}